Jared Turner

To be honest I doubt many people know who he is which is very unfortunate but I can also understand why with a show like the Almighty Johnsons a show that left me very very underwhelmed under his belt the 36 year old actor from New Zealand may have been better off being a model he certainly has the looks for it.

The Kid Who Didn't Make

I sit it here this dark room thinking, 
how many time can a heart be broken and still be expected to beat?
and then it Dawned on me it doesn't matter how many time you heart breaks
it will always keep on beating because time heals all wounds
what I realized was that after your heart is broken you lose,
You lose a little bit each time until eventually you run out.
Run out of love that is. 
Don't get me wrong you'll always have love for family and friends, 
but for the one, for the one who your meant for if they even exists 
it would be to late because everyone has come and stolen what was there
and left nothing behind for them. Nothing but the person with a frozen heart 
and ice in their veins. 

Honey Bear (kinkajou)

Me and my friends were talking yesterday and I was told that they could see me as a honey bear because they are apparently very cute.  You tell me is it cute?

Blood

There is so much blood and I didn't men to do it.
But it's to late now there is no undoing.
This blood on my hand I try to wash away
But still there is more to show me I'm to blame,
I can't understand how this could have happened
I scrub at my hand but still there is more
My hands are growing heavy my legs have gone weak
The are edges of grey just waiting to eat me.
I'll lay here for a second maybe then it will stop.
It didn't stop I didn't really want it to stop
I was ready for death I welcomed him like an old friend
Always when we visited I was quickly torn away.
First it was the pills then it was the drugs when I turned to liquor
I thought it would all be fine.
I finally turned to cutting and that seem to help
My emotions were stable and I needed less help
But I fooled my self again and this time when I met with death
I told him quite plainly "Take me from this place"
But all he did was smile and leaned in quite close and then whispered in my ears
"It's not yet time to go"
I looked at him with fear and anger in my heart. I started to scream but no sound would come out.
I felt the familiar tug at my heart
It meant I would not be long in this place.
I looked at death again and was surprised to see that it wasn't death at all
But an older version of me I woke with a start in a hospital bed.
Surrounded by face I had learned to dread
But tonight they looked solemn and full of despair
I couldn't understand it why were they there
I looked down at my arms all covered in white
and remembered that night I tried to take my life
I never saw death again after that night but then again
I grew more and more to look like him.
I have found balance in my life but I'm still have a yearning
I seek that one person that will truly understand me.

Anthony D. Jones

Bad Taste

So this whole experience has left a bad taste in my mouth about being friends with guys. So much so that I think that I won't even bother trying with someone else I guess I'm just not the kind of person to have male friends. Anyways he's ruined so many things that I enjoyed doing like playing  Kingdom Hearts and watching Jersey Shore. Meh Oh and my weight has taken a sharp decline. Going to take a walk down to the creek.